It’s been a bad two weeks for Christian loons Creflo “Child Abuser” Dollar and Mark “I’m A Dumbass for Thinking God Will Save Me from A Rattlesnake” Wolford
by Larry Simons
June 13, 2012
The nutty world of Christianity has suffered two big blows in the last 17 days. On May 27, 2012, Pastor [and loon] Mark Wolford [above left, with snake], a Pentecostal pastor from West Virginia who handled snakes on many occasions [even bitten previously but survived], died after a rattlesnake that he owned for years bit him during a church service near Bluefield, WV.
Unbelievably, the aforementioned snake-handling act is not the craziest part [although it’s very close]. The most insane aspects to this story [well, there’s many] are the following facts:
1. Wolford’s father died the very same way, from a rattlesnake bite, in 1983 at the age of 39.
2. Wolford practiced the act of snake-handling because he believed the Bible mandates it to test one’s faith in God.
3. He [along with his fellow loony congregation] believed that Mark 16:17-18 was to be taken literally. It states, “And these signs will follow those who believe: in My name they will cast out demons; they will speak with new tongues; they will take up serpents; and if they drink anything deadly, it will by no means hurt them; they will lay their hands on the sick, and they will recover.”
4. He actually believed that if one were bitten by a rattlesnake, God would heal them just by trusting in Him to do so.
My obvious first thought is simply this: If the Mark passage was to be taken literally by these buffoons, why is not every single one of these church members dropping dead by the dozens from drinking deadly liquids as the passage instructs? Why did they only single out “taking up serpents”?
This entire incident is a classic example of why the Bible itself is a work of fiction. Whenever the Bible instructs something that is harmless, such as doing missionary work or attending church, then, of course, the Bible is to be taken literally. However, when there are passages like Mark 16:17-18 that instructs believers to do insane acts, and believers take it literally and actually carry them out, the Christian community as a whole cries “well, that’s not to be taken literally”.
My question is, why not? The passage clearly states “these signs will follow those who believe”, then proceeds to list deeds that require a neurological disorder to practice. It clearly states that no harm will befall those who carry out these acts.
Deductive reasoning has no choice but to conclude that the death of Mark Wolford [and the likes of him] has proven one of two things: That either Wolford had no real faith [which most Christians would argue] or my stance, that the Bible is untrue and should be right beside Humpty Dumpty and Peter Rabbit on the shelves in every bookstore in the world.
I realize many will read my words and call me insensitive to the fact that a real person has died and I am name-calling. But, the fact remains that Wolford suffered from some type of neurological issue. There is no other conclusion to come to when a person truly believes that any higher power could protect them from a deadly reptile. The fact that Wolford even took the Bible literally to begin with is evidence that there was not enough marbles in his head for one to rest beside each of his ears.
On June 8, 2012, World Changers Church International founder and pastor/televangelist Creflo Dollar [above right in mugshot] was arrested in Fayetteville, Georgia after being charged with attacking his 15-year-old daughter. In the police report, Dollar’s daughter accused him of choking her, throwing her to the ground and beating her with his shoe after an argument about going to a party at 1 a.m.
Of course, Creflo denied all wrongdoing and said he would never beat his children. So, we are left to assume that his 15-year-old daughter just out of the blue got it in her head to simply make up a story that she was beaten by her father. Dollar’s older 19-year-old daughter confirmed the same story. I’m quite sure both daughters simply just invented the story for no apparent reason. They were bored and had a few hours to kill.
Dollar was released on $5,000 bail [chump change to Dollar, who owns two Rolls-Royce’s, a private jet, a million dollar home in Atlanta and a 2.5 million dollar home in Manhattan] and told his congregation last Sunday that the allegations made against him were nothing but “exaggeration and sensationalism” and that he should have never been arrested.
The most sickening thing about this story is that as Dollar spouted his bullshit about the incident to his equally loony congregation, they gave him an ovation screaming “We love you!” and “we got your back”. Only brain dead believers in fairy tales [who are already infected with deep neurological disorders] could overlook child abuse to give adoration to a national celebrity.
One church member stated that when she first heard the news, she didn’t believe it and that she knew there had to be more to the story. How disgusting. This is exactly the type of thing that goes on, not just in the mega-churches that are nationally televised, but in churches all across the country. Congregations who adore their pastors simply turn a blind eye to abuse in the home because they “don’t believe it”.
Spouses and children suffer inside a home by an abusive “man of God” and there’s nothing they can do. If it’s a mega-church and the pastor rakes in the kind of money Dollar makes, he simply can foot the bail and is released to go right back to the home to create more havoc and abuse. Then, to make matters worse, they go back to their churches where they are protected by the congregation, most of whom will “not believe it”.
Ironically, the exact same type of blind faith that is required to believe in the Bible to begin with is the exact same faith exercised when loonballs show their adoration to their pastor, even in the midst of child abuse allegations, which one has to ask, “Why would this happen now if it was not true?”
Why wouldn’t anyone believe it considering the flood of stories just in the past ten years of pastors and religious loons who abuse children, rape women and even kill others? Why would it even be shocking to believe Dollar is capable of this? I would wonder why it took so long for Dollar to commit these acts considering the fact that there seems to be something in the baptismal water that drives so many religious loons to commit crimes and atrocities so gruesome, they would make gang member blush.
I have come across so many of these stories of religious nutjobs committing murder, rape, abuse, theft, decapitations, etc, that I could devote my blog to it exclusively. There is something about the Bible that makes many feel entitled to have dominance over others to commit atrocities on them. It is almost as if they feel God himself gives them that power and authority.
It is sick and twisted and is the very reason why you hear these kinds of stories so often. In reality, if the Bible really had any power or influence on people, there would be NO incidents of barbarism inflicted on those at the hands of so-called “church people”, but these stories are rampant. Does anyone ever ask WHY there are so many stories of religious people who commit the most abhorrent acts? Acts that would make Jeffrey Dahmer or Ted Bundy envious?
The answer is clear: the Bible has no more influential power on the human race than Jack and the Beanstalk and Little Red Riding Hood. For every truly good Christian person, there are 1,000 Creflo Dollar's and Mark Wolford's claiming God is the main influence in their lives whilst they are clubbing their children with shoes and snuggling up to deadly reptiles like they were newborn kittens.
What power is it that gives an agnostic like myself more wisdom and common sense than the ones who claim they are getting everything they need in life directly from the almighty creator himself, and whose actions prove they obviously are not?
Case in point: I am still alive right this second typing this story because I did NOT follow the teaching in Mark 16 that says God will keep alive those who drink deadly liquids and play with snakes. But Wolford, who followed the teaching, is dead?
Does anyone have an explanation for this other than my own, which is, the Bible is false?